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Merry Christmas

May love and peace reign in everyone's heart this holiday season:)

Priceless gifts for Christmas

Whew! So fast. Few days from now and it's gonna be Christmas. A lot of gift giving, parties, and shopping and eating. But there are gifts worth giving this Christmas which makes us happier than anything you can find under the Christmas tree!

Gift of Gratitude- Say thanks to the people you love. Your husband, wife, daughter, son, friends, office mates. Say thanks not only to the people who give you gifts but to everyone who makes your Christmas merrier-from the cashier to your house helper. And above all say thanks to the one who is the reason why we celebrate Christmas - Jesus Christ.

Gift of trust - Share your innermost feelings to the person you trust - your spouse, parents, friends. It shows that you trust them and it also builds relationships.

Gift of listening - Give the carolers a chance to finish at least one song before handling them the change and closing the gate . Some might be in it for the money but that doesn't mean they don't love your attention.

Gift of words - Take a break from gossiping or badmouthing anyone. Use your word power instead to encourage someone. Your words should heal, not hurt.

Gift of space - Being in one house 24/7 during Christmas vacation may make you and your family get on each others nerves by New Year's. Respect the times when someone in your family just wants to do their own thing and have "me time" of your own.

Gift of time - Everyone has the same 24 hours a day so make the best of yours. Devote some precious time to helping others or caring for others. If time is gold, that should always be well spent.

Gift of contentment - Learning to love what you have instead of pitying yourself for what you don't have makes you more willing to give more generously. Count your blessings and find ways to share them.


Gift of family connection - You see your cousins every year but do you really know them? Talk to them especially in this times of family reunions and gatherings and find out what the biggest happening in their life for the past year.

Gift of forgiveness - How can you spread joy and goodwill to all if you have got grudges? Sincerely greet "Merry Christmas" to those people you don't talk to for several years and let the past be forgotten and forgiven.

Gift of letting go - Let go of past hurts and pains and move on with your life. Accept that change is the only constant thing in one's journey in life.

How to know if he's not a right guy for you

Does your instinct tells you that who you are dating is Mr. Wrong? Here are some telltale signs that the guy you're dating is more of a dud than a stud.

• He is selfish. If the word compromise is alien to your man's consciousness, chances are he's only thinking of himself. Healthy men know how to make compromises.


• He has no drive. Does your guy spend more time on parties with his buddies or watching TV than anything else?If he's busy doing things that don't take his life to new places then he might be a dud.


• He doesn't appreciate you. The guy you're dating should not only appreciate you but also respect you, your friends and family.


• He doesn't show emotion. To be in a healthy relationship, both parties need to be open and honest about their vulnerabilities and not be afraid to show their emotions. If you find that you're giving more emotionally to the relationship than he is, it might be time to move on.


• He doesn't have a good relationship with his mother. If a guy's relationship with his mother is constantly strained, it's not a good sign for your relationship. He does not have to be a mama's boy but a guy at any age must have a loving and healthy relationship with his mother.


• He makes you feel bad about yourself. Why would you want to be around with someone who doesn't make you feel happy, successful and fulfilled?If he doesn't listen to you and constantly puts you down , it's a sign of trouble.


• He's being untrustworthy. If you are unable to trust your partner, you will spend countless time and energy wondering about his capacity to be honest and straightforward about your relationship.

How to know your boyfriend's sincerity?

Here are tips to know if your boyfriend is sincere to you and truly loves you...

• He respects you and your values.


• He meets your parents and gets you to meet his parents.


• He includes you in his future plans.


• He prays for you.


• He does not have other girlfriends.


• He continous to communicate to you, telling you how special you are to him.


• He takess time to visit you in spite of his busy schedule.

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Beat up break- up blues

So, you just experienced a breakup. Sigh...and you honestly thought that it would never end. While you're here sulking yourself, there goes you ex flaunting around wit his/her new replacement. Arrggh! The mere thought of it makes you sad all the more. How could he/she do such a thing? Before you start taking that bottle of muriatic acid and down its content like a beer, here is an easy to follow process on how to beat that "noboyfriend/girlfriend" blues.

Cry yourself out. It oftentimes much better to let out all those feelings which you have bottled up inside through tears. haven't you noticed that after a bout with the sobs, you generally feel better than you did before you cried? Try it, it's a great therapy.

Listen to loud music. Mushy songs are no-nos at this time. loud music - be it hard metal, rock n roll, rap or disco music helps to take out those pent - up feelings in you, especially when you sing or shout along with it.

Exercise. Exerting effort on your body physically may lessen the emotional stress you are currently experiencing. You will be too tired to think of the good old days. Not only will you be able to sleep better at night, you will also be keeping fit. No food binges please...

Keep busy. Bury yourself in work.Perhaps go on overtime. If you are in school, take extra hours in the library. That would leave you with less idle time which permits you to think back about your recent misfortune. The less idle time, the better.

Take out your ex's picture. Then stick it unto your dartboard. No dartboard? Use a cork board instead. Or a bunch of needles and pins will do.

Make a list of your ex's shortcomings. couple it with your own list of what you did to continue your erstwhile relationship despite his inadequacies. Then compare notes. Intentionally make your list longer than his/hers. That sort of getting at him/her already.

Put all the items that remind you of your ex together in a box and keep it in a place where you will not be tempted to open it. Everything must be put away - pressed roses, love letters, pictures...everything. If you keep on wallowing in your past with your former flame, the letting go process will be delayed.

Have a makeover. For the heartbroken females, paint your fingernails fuchsia, change your hairstyle, change your disposition for the better. Make your self more beautiful than ever before. As for those forlorn guys, a great new change in wardrobe will do. Make heads turn.

Go out on a date. Meet people of the opposite sex. Mingle. In a short span of time, you will be back in the social circle again. Who knows? you might just end up getting to know someone new. But warning - no comparing of the former and the current date.

Party.have as much fun as a single person. If ever you encounter your ex in one of those social gatherings, show him/her how much you are enjoying yourself even without him/her in the picture. Greet your ex the way you greet a long lost friend.

Story that made me cry...

I checked my mails this morning on my other email account. I actually have three. I have seen a mail from my former boss. I know that emails from her are really interesting so I opened it. Wow...It's about marriage. Upon reading it, I can't help my tears from falling ... it's very touching. So I'm sharing this to you. It's a beautiful story, er, not so beautiful, actually ,because it's a sad one but it give's us a lesson or two...

To those who are married, .. Not married ... and soon to be married

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce.. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew.. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recallhow I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully..

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms.

She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying!

Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning.. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential partof his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not wantthe divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head.. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't valuethe details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I amsupposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

-0-

"The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank,blah..blah..blah. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!"

Signs of infedility

Infidelity or unfaithfulness is one of the reasons why couples break up. One partner is tempted and plays with fire. One thing leads to another, and a stable relationship is ruined!

Even if you don't see with your eyes that your partner is cheating on you, there are changes in his behavior that logically merit suspicion and may scream fidelity.

• He becomes secretive. If your significant other doesn't ask permission when going out, doesn't inform you of his whereabouts, hides his mobile phone, doesn't answer his mobile phone around you, behaves in an eerie manner when talking to someone on the phone, and suddenly becomes reticent about what's happening in his life, then he be definitely hiding something from you.
  

• He suddenly changes his routine. Does he constantly leave too early in the morning or come home in the wee hours of the morning? Have you noticed him going to the gym more often? Although changes in routine is inevitable in a person's life, but you should know how to distinguish from the truth and the lie.
  

• His personality has changed. If your partner shows changes in his personality or behavior like sudden mood swings, or becoming nonchalant, apathetic even if he is not inflicted with bipolar disorder, there may be a reason he is acting strange. Another way to tell if your significant other is cheating is when he criticizes you more. He finds faults with your behavior to justify his cheating. This way, he can reason that you push him away from you. The exact opposite is being extremely nice, generous, and amorous because he wants to make up of his transgressions.

• He lacks intimacy. Having intimacy is not tantamount to having sex. You can show your emotional and physical intimacy to a person by touching, cuddling, holding hands, kissing or just talking lovingly and wholeheartedly. His lack of affection towards you may be a sign he might be seeing someone else.

• He cheated on his ex-girlfriends. Find time to talk to his old girlfriends discreetly. It may save you a lot of heartaches. If he has the audacity to cheat on his past girlfriends, then, there's a bigger chance for him to do it again. As one psychologist put it, " A person's past behavior will almost always determine his future behavior".

• He keeps buying things. Does he purchase expensive and unnecessary items for unknown people? Are his telephone bills higher than usual? Is he visiting unfamiliar places without you?
  

There are really lots of lukewarm relationships out there and statistics continue to go up. If you want not to be a part of that statistics, give time to nurture your relationship. As one writer said "unlike planes, relationships cannot be maintained on auto-pilot".

Preventing Infedility in Marriage

Life is full of twists and turns. Sometimes we are shocked to hear news of couples whose strong marriage once we admired but broken into pieces. Here are some preventive steps to guard one's fidelity and help your marriage remain intact.

Talk openly about anything and everything. Don't belittle the importance of small talk. You gain nothing by keeping your thoughts and feelings to yourself.

Cultivate your friendship. Go places with each other. Talk about your interests or current events in your lives. Do things together. Do not allow yourself to take your partner's friendship and feelings for granted.

Be supportive. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. A person's lifetime is an expensive period of time. Things change and so are people's interests. Your partner will at some point want to try something new, such as career, spiritual or life habit change. These are critical moments in your relationship.

Keep your passion alive and well. No one wants to feel undesired. Take a moment now and then to leave little notes around the house. Let your children see you kiss and cuddle. Indulge in an impromptu escapade.

Don't be predictable.The spark of interest can fade when you feel you know your partner to the point of predictability. Always allow for a little mystery.Occasionally do something that is a bit out of the norm.

Love or Infatuation?

What is love? I've read one definition of love which says " Love is a heterogeneous conglomeration of absurdity calculated to bamboozle the anatomy of the individual who becomes intoxicated with its abominable and irresistible power". Another one says " Love is a feeling you feel when you feel that you're going to get a feeling that you never felt before". Whatever that is, it surely isn't love!

The shortest and most most profound love statement is "God is love". And others would say that it's not that kind of love that they are talking about. Love that is romantic - the hugging and kissing love. But that is the kind of love we are talking about - all true love ->parent for child, husband for wife, girlfriend for boyfriend - all true love comes from God. But for every good thing that God created, the devil has improvised a counterfeit. Love's counterfeit is infatuation. The big question is: how can one discern the counterfeit from the genuine? Here are some differences:

• Infatuation is ruled by feelings, but love's feelings are ruled by principles. In the field of infatuation, the feelings are in charge. But the problem is that our feelings are fickle. They change easily. Today I feel great so I kiss her. Tomorrow I feel terrible so I kick her. That's not love! True love has feelings, tender feelings which are put in the human heart by a caring God. But love is not composed of feelings only. It is feelings plus principle. Moreover, love is not controlled by feelings. It does not do anything and everything it feels. Rather, in true love, the feelings are under the control of principle.

• Infatuation is blind, but love sees and examines. Like Cupid, infatuation is blind. When a girl recognizes that her boyfriend is hooked on drugs but still proceeds with plans for marriage, Cupid has wounded her. When a boy observes his girlfriend flirting continuously with other men, but still goes ahead with the love affair, infatuation has blinded him! True love uses its eyes to see and examine weaknesses of the prospective partner. It is not afraid to ask hard questions nor do difficult examinations.

• Infatuation is in a hurry, but love takes time. Everything of permanent value in life takes time. We can build a shack overnight, but if we are building a house that will stand the fury of a typhoon or hurricane, that takes time. We can put up an artificial Christmas tree overnight, but to grow a real tree takes time. It has to be planted, watered and nourished for weeks, months or years. Love is a plant - a tender, precious plant. Infatuation is ever in a hurry. See her today, court her tomorrow and marry her the day after!Growing a relationship takes time and God expects couples in love to "grow up".

• Infatuation is obsessed with externals, but love is concerned with internals. Puppy love is obsessed with the figure, is a slave to fashion, and is intoxicated with sex appeal. True love admires the figure, appreciates appropriate fashion, and anticipates sexual intimacy within the bond of marriage. But these are not the greatest concerns of true love. True love is more concerned with the personality, the kind of person the partner really is. Love examines the habits, the inner virtues or vices. True love pays attention to the character, the inner self.

• Infatuation is childish but love is mature. Childish and selfish love has little or no concern for the other. It is self-centered. But true love is concerned with the welfare of one's partner. Infatuation cries for gratification today regardless of the consequences later. But true love refrains from enjoying today that which it will regret tomorrow. Infatuation thinks and behaves like a child, but true love is mature - it has put childish ways behind.
  

• Infatuation is a human ditch, but love is a divine ladder. One goes down the other goes up. infatuation is a ditch into which blindfolded people fall, but love is a ladder onto which wide-eyed people climb. so, while infatuation is a human pit, true love is a divine ladder. And every person has the freedom to choose between the tragedy of one and the triumph of the other.
  

Things Every Wife Should Know about her Husband

It is vital that husband and wife must understand each other to experience marital success. Here are facts about men that the woman should master to understand her partner.

• He is Proud to be a Man. While society tends to belittle the woman, it is programed to feed the ego of the man. Since the man believes he is big, it is counterproductive for a woman to constantly belittle him. Since the man thinks he is great, a perceptive woman will respect him. A wise wife does not serve him dishes of humiliation, rather she provides a feast of admiration.

• He Shows Love in Tangible Terms. We have said that love should be frequently expressed in verbal terms - the loving words we say. Love may be shown in aesthetic ways - the tender tokens we give. But many men are most comfortable in revealing love in tangible terms - the pesos and centavos. After all, if the former are present and the latter is absent, wouldn't there be justification of questioning love?

• He Makes Decisions Differently. In general, men are more left brained than women. This means that a man tends to process data logically and sequentially, proceeding from cause to effect. So, in solving problems, the woman is more likely to be subjective and the man, more objective. While the wife uses her gift of intuition, the husband uses his skills of reason. An understanding of these differences will help to minimize conflict. Rather than repel, these differences should attract partners to one another, enabling each to welcome each other's points of view for the enrichment of the decision making process.

• A Man Likes His Wife to be Attractive. Before marriage, a woman takes great care to be as attractive as possible to her mate. But sometimes, after marriage, she devotes less care to her appearance, taking the marital relationship for granted. Every wife should help to provide an answer to her husband's prayer "Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one". If ever he was being tempted elsewhere, when a husband arrives home, the temptation should vanish in the sprkle of his wife's beauty and the perfume of her embrace.
  

Secrets to a Successful Marriage

It's always interesting to see old people walking together, holding hands, being so sweet with each other. And I wonder how their relationship remained so strong in so many years that they have been together when I see a lot of broken marriages and broken families. In a book entitled "I Love You" by Gordon Martinborough, which I have been reading lately, he tells about the three big secrets of a happy marriage.

First secret is loving yourself. What does it have to do with a happy marriage? If you do not love yourself, you make yourself unlovable! In other words, you make it difficult for others to love you. After all, whoever wants to marry Mr. or Miss Misery? And if you do not love yourself it is difficult for you to give love to somebody else for you cannot share what you do not have.

Second secret is the self sacrificing love. A kind of love that puts the desire of the other above and before the needs of one's self is the quality of love that constitutes the second secret of a successful marriage. While the first key to a successful marriage is to love oneself, the second secret is to love your partner better than yourself. If each partner will practice this principle, most marital problems will disappear.

The third secret , the most important ingredient of a successful marriage," Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind"(Luke 10:27). What does loving God have to do with a loving, happy marriage? The answer is simple but profound "God is love" (1 John 4:8).

A happy marriage may be likened to a triangle with Christ at the apex and husband and wife at the corners of the base. When the partners are far from Christ, they remain distant from each other. As each spouse moves toward Jesus, they get closer to one another. And when each connects with Christ, they become connected to each other. Love for God is the primary secret of a successful marriage.

Top Ten EC Droppers for September

I would like to say THANK YOU to my top ten EC droppers for September. Here they are...Drum roll please....:)

1. All Stace, All the Time
2. RealityTalkBlog
3. Fantasy Brunch
4. technochest
5. Download Free CSS Templates
6. From This Side
7. Avon Romance Blog
8. Chaos Tech
9. Dogs Deserve Freedom
10.HoopLink

My Birthday!

Today is my birthday. I really feel blessed and there are a lot of things to be thankful for- my family, my friends. I'm having this mclinky links for those visitors from today (my birthday) until September 25, 2009. So, get listed my dear friends.

Rekindle that "Just-Met-Sex" with your Partner

Long term love has all its advantages – a strong intimacy with each other, a shared history with the one you love, a warm and satisfying sexual connection. But still, sometimes you miss that erotic charge when your love was still brand new. Here are tips on how to recapture again that spark when you and your partner just started having sex.

1. Create a little distance. Best friends, partners, soul mates – that’s what many couples strive to be. But while that kind of relationship provides warmth and security, it’s not always sexy. The very things that love thrives on like familiarity, stability and security are the very things that can also kill the passion and lust in a relationship. For desire to thrive on, you need to maintain some of the elusiveness and independence you had when you were first together. If you’re too available to your partner, too open with each other, you lose that edge. That’s why for the sake of your sex life, it’s a good idea to make some space. A little bit of distance and separation, both physical and emotional, can actually fuel sexual excitement because it sets up a “thrill of a chase” kind of dynamic, similar to what you had when you were first dating.

2. Rediscover each other. What makes just – met sex so exciting is the sense of the unknown and the anticipation of what might happen. You’re still discovering each other’s bodies, finding new ways to turn each other on and testing new waters. A classic way to reboot your sexual relationship is to go away together, for a week, few days, or even just a night. Call it a sex vacation. It’s an opportunity to go back to the beginning when you didn’t have babies, shared bills, or a mortgage, and your relationship was just about the two of you having fun.

3. Shock your system – The perma-smile plastered on your face, that tingling below the belt, the goose bumps you got when he touched you. Thank you hormones. The novelty and excitement of a new sexual partner triggers the production of dopamine and norepinephrine, neurotransmitters that are responsible for that love high.

4. Tune in to your sexy side. When you’re dating, your appearance and sexual confidence are often a priority But once you’re married and have other things going on in your life, you don’t always put as much focus to your sexuality. Think back when you felt sexiest in your life. When you let your inner sexiness shine, he can’t help but respond to that energy.

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Caring and Nurturing your Marital Relationship

• Go on regular dates that do not involve children.

• Keep the romance alive by doing things you both like to do together.

• Arrange a regular time each week , or more often to talk about each other’s thoughts.

• Show appreciation for the other.

• Compliment the other person.
  
  
  

Why chocolates Make You Love?

Although chocolates contain saturated fats which could pose health risks, researchers have discovered several health benefits of chocolates:

1. Chocolates contain caffeine, an ingredient found in a cup of coffee and ola drinks that gives an invigorating feeling. It’s a proven stimuilant that energizes your brain.

2. Chocolates have phynelethylamine. This is the chemical released in the blood to those who are passionately in love.

3. Chocolates release endorphins, the chemical that gives chocolate lovers the inner glow and glorious high feelings.

4. Chocolates contain antioxidants that prevent cancer.

5. Chocolates have anandamide which promotes well-being.

6. Chocolates scontain tryptophan, an essential amino acid which modulates a person’s mood.

7. Lastly, chocolates contain the “love chemical” phynelethylamine. This trace chemical targets the pleasure centers of the brain. More phynelethylamineare produced during orgasm. In addition, phynelethylamine mediates feelings of attraction, euphoria, and excitement.

So if you want your lover to be more intense, romantic and committed towards you, don’t consult witches or magicians, simply give your lover a chocolate bar to nibble and you will be glad you did!

In Love or Insane?

So you're head over heels in love, or at least you think you are. You have all the symptoms - you can't eat, can't sleep, and can't seem to think about anything other than your next encounter. But sometimes, that wonderful feeling can turn borderline weird, and if not kept in check, can quickly turn into full blown obsession. Can't tell the difference between the two just yet? Read upon these telltale signs to protect you from becoming that unlovable psycho-stalker guys steer clear of.

It's Love if - You get excited when you hear your phone ring, then slightly disappointed when you find out it's not him calling.

It's Obsession if - You have a separate line and number especially for him.

It's Love if - You have him on speed dial.

It's Obsession if - You call him in the middle of the night, then hang up when he answers. You just want to hear his voice.

It's Love if - You know what his favorite kind of candy is.

It's obsession if - You pick up his discarded wrapper and keep it in your wallet so you can have a piece of him wherever you go.

It's Love if - You have a song just for him.

It's Obsession if - You only have that one song on your ipod and it's on loop.

It's Love if - You already know all of his little quirks.

It's Obsession if - You try to imitate all of these little quirks and make them yours too.

It's Love if - You invite him over for dinner with your family.

It's Obsession if - He must come everyday, no excuses.

It's Love if - You have him as your phone wallpaper.

It's Obsession if - You have him as your room wallpaper.

It's love if - You text him out of the blue just to see how he's doing.

It's Obsession if - You text him out of the blue and ask what he's doing, who he's with, where he's going next, what time he'll be home, and again, who's he's with every ten minutes.

How to Spot a Good Guy in Five Days

This doesn't necessarily mean five days straight. Maybe you've been starting to hang out since you were introduced to each other recently. There are a million of possible circumstances but only a number of signs to look out for if you want to be sure this guy is a quality catch.

• He shows everybody respect. Everybody deserves respect, and he should know that. If he doesn't show the most unassuming people (like sales peoplesecurity guards, drivers, and house help) the most basic courtesies like "thank you" and "please", you're better off telling him to please leave you alone.

• He's being real. You've been getting to know each other for five days and if in any point, you feel that the way he's acting seems fishy or fake, chances are you're right, and he's putting up front to impress you. Follow your instincts! Don't buy it, and make him know you don't appreciate it. It's better if you know who you're getting involved with from the get go.

• Your friends like him. Your friends are your friends for a reason. If they sense something amiss about this guy, you'd best be on your guard. Maybe the sparks that have been created by your intense chemistry have blinded you, but rest assured your pals are always looking out for you. They're like vitamin C-they'll protect you from germs and jerks:D
  

Romancing the Budget

We have always wanted to show to our loved ones that we love them right? Failure to express our love to them is somehow a "sin of omission". There are simple ways of showing our love to them. We don't need to mortgage our futures for jewelry, charter a jet to a secluded beach, or book a room in a posh hotel to live out that biblical command which is to love and respect our spouse. Here are simple activities that can keep the sizzle in romance and warmth in expressions of our love:

Outwit Hallmark. Give your spouse a homemade love card. Make it on the computer or cut out magazine pictures for the artwork. Extra points: Write an original poem. Unless you're an English teacher, don't worry about the meter and rhyme.

Note your affection. Dot the house with sticky notes expressing your appreciation of each other. Put them in odd places like in the baby's diaper stack ("I love you from the bottom of my heart"), by the toothpaste ("Thinking of you makes me smile"), or the sock drawer ("I'm glad you're my mate").

Send love for lunch. Decorate a spouse's lunch sack or write a sweet note on the paper napkin. Cut a heart out of the orange rind. Use a marking pen to apply your love message to a banana.

Come up with codes. One couple knows that "1-4-3," whether written or spoken, means "I Love You". (The numbers are the number of letters in each word.)

Make it a game. A husband came home to a love message spelled out on a Scrabble board on the living room floor. But be sure to pick it up before the kids awaken.

Leave love reminders. Let absence make the heart grow fonder. I know a wife who before leaving for a weekend conference created a "dummy" for their bed bu stuffing her silky black nightie with her husbands underwear and adding a note-"Can't wait to come home!" A husband leaves his wife notes to open each morning while he's away.

Dim the lights. Gather several small candles in a tray, light them, add some mugs of his/her favorite juice and lead your spouse to a special cuddle-and-talk- place.

Mark "monthiversaries". Grab the calendar and, each month, draw a big heart around the day of the month you were married. Celebrate simply, with a moonlight walk or romantic music on the stereo instead of TV news as dinner background.

Count up your love. Eight anniversary? Give your spouse something with 8 in it and something more original than 8 roses. She might just get excited over a note offering 8 hours away from the kids. He might appreciate 8 tokens for the automatic car wash.

Bag the nag. Do something your spouse has repeatedly asked you to do and you haven't done such as clean up the workbench or deep-clean you clothes closet. Make a big deal of this being your "love job" and be sure to do it cheerfully.

Biggest Mistakes Couples Make

According to Helene Rothschild, a family and marriage therapist, there are common mistakes that can undermine one's loving relationship.

The following mistaken beliefs and truths can assist you to create and maintain the loving union that you desire:

Mistake #1. All I have to do is love my partner and all will be perfect.

Truth - Love is not enough to maintain a relationship. You also need to like your partner, create win-win solutions to your problems, and have similar values, goals, and interests. It takes two happy people with high self - esteem and good communications skills t ocreate a healthy relationship.

Mistake # 2. My partner is responsible for my hurt feelings, anger, and frustrations.

Truth - You are totally responsible for all your feelings and actions. Way before you were in your loving relationship, you were influenced by your parents, siblings, teachers, etc. and you made decisions based on your experiences. These decisions cause you to perceive things in the present that may be not true.

For example, if your mother of father was not there for you, you probably decided that you were not good enough, unimportant, unworthy and unlovable. These negative decisions will likely be projected in your partner. therefore, if he /she does not call, your hurt maybe caused by the decision that you are unimportant. The truth is that you are important even if your partner does not call.

Mistake # 3. I am adult now, and my parents have no influence to me.

Truth - Without exception, every client realized that they unconsciously married someone like their mother or father to resolve issues with them.

Mistake #4. Once I am in a committed relationship, I can focus my work, sports, hobbies, etc.,

Truth - A successful relationship requires focus, time and energy. just like everything else that is important to you. If you are hired for a position and you don't work at doing a good job, you are likely to be fired. The same is true in a loving union. It is important not to take each other for granted, and to spend quality time together, read relationship books, take steps to improve your communication.

Mistake # 5. I can treat my partner anyway I choose and we will be together forever.

Truth - If you treat your partner as you would your bestfriend, he/she is more likely to want to stay in the relationship. Everyone likes and deserves appreciation, respect, kindness, attention, affection and compliments. Be as loving as you can, and it will come back to you and strengthen your loving bond.

Now that you have some insights for a healthy relationship, you have a better chance at succeeding. You deserve a fantastic relationship. Go for it!

How to Have a Successful Marriage

Everyone wants to have a happy married life. Nobody wants a broken family, the pain of going through divorce or separation, the agony of seeing one's childen suffer resulting from a parent's miserable or chaotic marriage.

I have read an article about a woman who has been married for a long time and share to you how she survived the roller coaster ride of marriage.

Don't Nag. Nagging accomplishess nothing. It only widens the gap between you and your husband. No husband ever appreciates a nagging wife.

Believe. Let your husband feel he can be trusted. This is very hard to do especially when you believe otherwise. Yet, doing so will make him feel good. He will love you more for it. Nothing hurts a husband's ego than when he feels his own wife does not trust him.

Accept. Accept his strenghts and weaknesses. Praise him for his accomplishments and support him during his low moments. When you decided to marry him, you did not marry just a part of him but all of him.

Love yourself. When you love yourself, you have enough love to share with your husband. Loving one's self means, among other things, taking care of your health, practicing healthy hygiene, making yourself attractive for your husband.

Be pleasant. Be pleasant to come home to. A husband may tolerate a messy home but never a quarrelsome wife. Remember that on the job your husband may have attractive and sweet coworkers. Make no room for temptation to come in. Be sure your sweet smile and loving embrace are ready to welcome him home.

Talk. Never assume.Talk things over. A husband and wife will always be able to resolve things by talking. This practice allows one to see through each one's perspective, eventually reaching a compromise.

Listen. Talking accomplishes nothing, however , if neither listens. Before exploding into a barrage of words, listen. It will give you the chance to understand and digest what your partner wants to convey.

Forgive. Be ready to forgive your mate for his misgivings. Forgiveness lightens your heart and gives you freedom to start anew with your mate. This may be hard to do but the relief it gives you is worth the sacrifice.

Share. When you share your thoughts and feelings, it makes it possible for both of you to know each other better.

Be a vegetarian. This may sound weird and out of context but science and experience has taught me however that high intake in flesh foods causes irritability and ill temperament. Thus, eliminate or limit your meat intake of flesh foods for cooler heads.

Trust God. Would you like to be free from anxieties, worries and uncertainties in your marriage? Trust God. You will find it easier to trust your mate completely if you trust God first. With God there is nothing to fear.

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Marital Benefits

There are advantages of being married. Here are some of its benefits:

• Between the ages 35 and 39, a married man is only half as likely to die as his divorced counterpart.
  


• Widowed and divorced people are more likely to consult their doctor, especially for mental disorders.
  


• Married people are more likely to survive heart disease and cancer than divorced people.
  
  
• Aged 25 to 44, a married man is only a third as likely to commit suicide as a single, divorced, or separated man.
  


• Unmarried people smoke and drink more than married ones. Single women are most likely of all to drink excessively.

So, go and get hitched :))

Top Ten Reasons Why Men Cheat

According to a survey, men are more likely to cheat than their female partner. Here's why...

1. They have many options. Men are born hunters and as long as they see "preys" they will not stop wanting more.

2.Cheating boosts their ego. Men love to be chased by women because they think it's a proof of their masculinity.

3. They think that you're growing apart. When boredom and predictability set in, he begins to wander and look for someone more exciting.

4. They argue with their partner a lot. Arguments can be tedious.

5. They have fallen out of love. The worst, and probably the most painful reason to accept.

6. Sex with their partner sucks. Although sex is not a foundation for a stable relationship, men sometimes look for physical intimacy to satisfy their libido and if they can't get it from you, he might look somewhere else.

7. They want to take revenge. Cheating begets cheating. If you cheated on him, he will most likely cheat on you too.

8.They want something new, different and exciting. Some men get tired of the same old plain girls so they may try someone different and "exotic".

9. They want to see if they can get away with it. Astute, calculating, and manipulative men who try to cheat just for the heck of it think that the woman does not know, would not hurt her.

10. Their partner allowed their cheating in the past. Men will always cheat on their partner every chance they get because they know that they could easily be forgiven. Once is enough. If you forgave him once, then you are naive. But if you forgave him twice, then you are stupid.

Sex Trivia

I'm sure by now you've gotten your fill of sex info - from magazines, TV shows, newspapers, books, internet and the list goes on. You've already established sex facts ( you do it with someone you really love, practice safe sex, tsk, tsk...). You've gone through a lot of sex jokes- from texts, from friends...And had that extremely awkward discussion with your mom!

Think you know your sex smarts? Know which mammal gets the most foreplay? That male bats have the highest rate of homosexuality than any group of mammals that exists. From my readings, I found this article about sex trivia. Check it out!

• Talk about faithful - lions have sex 500 times with only one mate, to ensure fertilization.

• Who says you have to wait for puberty? Sperm whales are sexually mature as soon as they are born.

• Some animals don't need to join the mile high club. Eagles get their nookie while going up to 60 mph in flight. It's also common for them to hit the ground before they finish.

• If you don't want to be too obvious, get the razor - A man's beard grows fastest when he anticipated sex.

• The next time you fake a headache to get out of sex, well, the secret is out - A female orgasm is a powerful painkiller, thanks to the release of certain hormones. Sorry girls.

• Here's another thing that will frustrate those who can't get laid - according to World Health Organization, there are about 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day.

• Sex for one hour will burn off Hershey's Kisses, equal to 360 calories. I'd rather walk.

• Bill Gates is a heartthrob. Not because his looks beats those , oh , Brad Pitt, but because it's a fact that 50 percent of people fantasize more about money than sex. Give me a piece of that Microsoft! hehe

• Cats, too, get STDs, although they aren't as serious as humans. Feline STDs can be cured. Also a certain musical note sexually excites cats...the same one that makes little kittens run for their litter box.

• You might want to think twice before you start whispering that song stuck in your head - whistling is a subconscious way to attract the opposite sex.

• Armadillo sex organs, when disconnected , are still active. And I thought lizard's tails were gross.

• Think twice before you cheat. Eighty-five percent of all men who died of heart attacks while having sex were cheating on their wives.

• The Latin word for "vagina" was "vanilla" because of plant's pods resembling the female genitalia. Ice cream, anyone?

• Rumor has it that lipstick was invented back during those Egyptian times for women who performed oral sex. They wanted their lips to look.....inviting!