Saturday, October 10, 2009

Secrets to a Successful Marriage

It's always interesting to see old people walking together, holding hands, being so sweet with each other. And I wonder how their relationship remained so strong in so many years that they have been together when I see a lot of broken marriages and broken families. In a book entitled "I Love You" by Gordon Martinborough, which I have been reading lately, he tells about the three big secrets of a happy marriage.

First secret is loving yourself. What does it have to do with a happy marriage? If you do not love yourself, you make yourself unlovable! In other words, you make it difficult for others to love you. After all, whoever wants to marry Mr. or Miss Misery? And if you do not love yourself it is difficult for you to give love to somebody else for you cannot share what you do not have.

Second secret is the self sacrificing love. A kind of love that puts the desire of the other above and before the needs of one's self is the quality of love that constitutes the second secret of a successful marriage. While the first key to a successful marriage is to love oneself, the second secret is to love your partner better than yourself. If each partner will practice this principle, most marital problems will disappear.

The third secret , the most important ingredient of a successful marriage," Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind"(Luke 10:27). What does loving God have to do with a loving, happy marriage? The answer is simple but profound "God is love" (1 John 4:8).

A happy marriage may be likened to a triangle with Christ at the apex and husband and wife at the corners of the base. When the partners are far from Christ, they remain distant from each other. As each spouse moves toward Jesus, they get closer to one another. And when each connects with Christ, they become connected to each other. Love for God is the primary secret of a successful marriage.
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